Mama

mama

 

oh mama

I don’t tell you enough-

I don’t show you enough

but, I love you.

 

I’ve never given you enough credit.

For those days when it was just you and me and Jessi.

 

We were still so little

And I bet you were scared

After all, how much longer could we, would we make it

 

But you never faltered.

never defaulted from the strong, happy woman that you are

 

And we made it.

 

Day after day

you proved to be enough.

 

And I never gave you enough credit

And Jessi didn’t either

 

Because dad was my hero

and I had him on a pedestal.

When the true hero was right at home

 

working full time

having great meals ready

praying for Jessi and I

and never tiring.

 

In my arrogance, I’ve wondered how we made it.

How you were enough to push Jessi and I forth.

 

But I know now

it’s not degrees

it’s not language

it’s not money or titles or houses or cars or vacations that ensure thriving survival-

 

it’s love

and

it’s strength

and

it’s courage

and it’s facing ever day with a bold determination

 

you were and are an arsenal of love and strength and courage and determination.

 

But we never gave you enough credit.

 

Remember that van you used to drive?

The ‘84 Aerostar?

Always overheating, never enough steering fluid.

 

We’d hear you coming from afar

and we’d wish you drove something else.

something better.

But you were always there

always coming for us

and that’s what’s important.

 

And when I turned 16 dad bought me a brand spankin’ new car

he was my hero

And you said I couldn’t keep it

that we couldn’t afford it

and I made you a villain

and I kept the stupid Jetta

 

But today, I know you were right.

And I just wanted to tell you.

 

we never gave you enough credit

 

And today, I want to give you buckets of credit

buckets galore mama

 

Because you were perfect

Because you are perfect

 

You are the main ingredient in the recipe that is me.

 

I wish I could give the world a healthy dose of you, mama.

and my, how the world would change

We’d be a happy, loving, strong, courageous, giving world.

 

And I wish we lived in the same city

So I could have more time to pour those buckets of credit on you

now that I know you deserve them and all.

 

but you know, life has a funny way

of being a slingshot

pulling us far, far away from ground zero

until the point where we can’t bear but to lust to come back

 

And I know today is just a regular Tuesday

 

like any other Tuesday on any other calendar.

 

But on this any-other-Tuesday

I remembered

 

I don’t tell you enough.

I don’t show you enough.

 

I love you.

2 thoughts on “Mama

  1. Pingback: Convicted —
  2. Jessica Gomez says:

    Mom is the greatest mom out there,she did do everything for us and always will, I love her! dunno where id be without her=)

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